Pre-Vacation Jitters

Any parent worthy of the title preparing for a trip goes through more emotional upheaval than the lava suspended in a lamp. 

I'm going on vacation! I can read! I can sleep in! I don't have to share my lunch!  I don't have to make lunch! I don't have to change diapers! It will be the first time in ages! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Then, one of your babies comes up and cuddles up on your lap, says, "Huggies" and asks you to read a book and you start to shake in remorse.

I am a terrible person. I'm leaving my babies! How could I even THINK of leaving my babies?  Maybe I'll take one with me....and you start considering how to break it to your husband that there will be three of us on this trip.

And then they come to you with a fight over the remote to the Wii and the fact that one of the kids refuses to use her own Mii on the Wii because she doesn't want to hurt her pro stats while testing out her tennis game.

We're going away in two days.  Come on come on come on come on.  Time is CRAWLING.  It's time to pack. I can't believe I'm going!  We'll get to see a baseball game from start to finish.  He bought tickets to a play for us!  I can swim without worrying that anyone other than me is drowning.  Maybe I'll even try surfing.  That would be cool!  And I can eat fish without commentary like EWWWWW GROSSS!  I can also wear a swimsuit without the commentary like EWWW and Mom, you should exercise.  Yes, it's been said by tactful ones.  I'm no longer remorseful.  I'm anxious, let's GET Going!

My littlest one crinkles up her nose to smile at me as I change her into a new outfit and stop to admire her beautiful dimples in her cheeks and her buddah like form.   I breathe in the perfume that is a baby's, my baby's scent.  There is no way I'm getting on that plane.  How could I possibly leave this little dumpling?  She's adorable and she's so little.

MOM! The upstairs bathroom toilet is clogged and you don't want to see the basement. 

Leaving in two days. Leaving in two days.  Five days no dishes! Five days no laundry! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Does this mean we won't go see Harry Potter together for opening night?  Hey Mom, my tooth is loose!

I've gone to opening night with them for every movie of this series!!! How could I have been so thoughtless? And she's going to lose her first tooth and I'm going to miss it.  Ah!!!!  I'm going to miss out on so much! What am I doing?  I don't have to go...I could stay here....a staycation, write a bit, maybe take them to the pool...

Then it hits me, I'm really going.  It's like the start of school caught up with me when I wasn't looking. I'm taking a big chunk of summer by going right in the middle. 

MOMMMM! The washer didn't work, all the clothes are soggy.
48 hours. 48 hours.  47 hours and 59 minutes....

While packing, my brain goes into guilt overtime. What am I going to do on vacation? How will I fill up the time?  I've been so much do...I don't know if I can just be.   What if the kids are angry I left? My youngest son comes to grab my leg.  My lip quivers.  He won't understand that I'll be back. He'll just know Mom is gone. 

I'm a mess.   

The only thing that will brake this ongoing cycle in my brain will be the actual trip! It's a good thing my husband bought the tickets already.

As for the blog, not to worry, I've secured my oldest son, "Not Named Jeffy" to take on next week's postings and humor.   I'll be back on Friday!