Wednesday, July 28, 2010

House Minority Whip

Attention children! 

There are four weeks left of summer.  If you have more than one book left to read, more than two weeks of math sheets to finish or more than one paper or project to complete, put down the comic, unplug the TV and stop viewing Dragonball Z and Phineas and Ferb on the computer.  Those 28 days will come quickly and there will be interruptions for things like hair cuts, school supplies, doctor's appointments, swimming, movies, little camping or vacation trips and baseball games. 

You do not want to miss out on going to the pool because you have to read Rebecca. 

You do not want to have to forgo the movies to finish a Charlotte's Web diorama.

The 12 pages of math may be possible to be finished in a 12 hour period but it will be a miserable 12 hours.  

I know I am Cassandra; I'm like the powerless minority opposition.  In many cases I speak the truth and no one listens because they value their own position more than anything forthcoming.  Even the ones who may follow my sage advice won't be actually grateful.  Top that with the fact that I hate nagging even if I know it's for their own good.

But I'm a Mom and so it's part of the job.  I have to make sure they do this.   However I know from years of experience and watching Congress, you put no stick without the carrot.   So here's today's get your homework done deal.  

"Finish two pages of math each and we're going to the pool for the evening.  Anyone who doesn't do two pages gets left behind and will have to endure an educational historical documentary." 

Tomorrow, we'll employ movie tickets; those staying behind get to sort socks.  I'll keep providing suitable bribes and less savory alternatives until the homework job is done; at which point I should be sufficiently experienced in graft enough to run for Congress. 

Wish someone would use this method with me to get the laundry and the paperwork done.  Where are my lobbyists?  Won't someone please try to buy my influence by doing the dishes? 

3 comments:

Lisa Dovichi said...

Amen Sistah!! Amen!!! Where's my reward for spending the day doing laundry, dishes, and changing diapers????

There needs to be a nonprofit for us, darn it!

MightyMom said...

bwahahaha!!!

you may only come play Thesaurus Thursday at my place IF everyone in the house has clean underwear!

Maria said...

I told Maddie she could only do 3 pages of her math workbook per week. Forbidden fruit still works on a 5 year old!

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