It's Friday so you get your Political Hit today...

Someone check the calendar, Hillary thinks it’s Christmas.

Here, we are on the decision weekend for the DNC Rules committee and suddenly, the latest pastor of the Trinity Church in Chicago gives up a sound bite that, if not for the fact that it is truth, would be a parody so sharp as to border on dangerous.

http://www.nypost.com/seven/05302008/news/nationalnews/more_holy_mess_for_obama_113146.htm

Someone should investigate if this Catholic priest, Fr. Pfleger recently received a sizable donation from the HRC campaign. The AP reports that Fr. Pfleger has been a spiritual and fiscal supporter of Obama, even being listed until yesterday when these sound bites found the light of day via YouTube, on Barrack’s website as part of those who give spiritual testimony and support.

Their relationship spans decades. Pfleger has given money to Obama's campaigns and Obama as a legislator both at the state and federal level has directed at least $225,000 towards social programs at St. Sabina’s according to the Chicago Tribune, but of course, there was no quid pro quo.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/entertainment/chi-0705030035may03,0,7803217.story

But I also have to question the timing of this coming to light. These things do not happen by accident, especially if Clintons are involved. The money aspect with this priest reminds me of the dish washers in San Francisco and those monks that had such largess for the DNC candidates. Perhaps it's all just a misunderstanding. Maybe economic times are not as tight as we’ve been told. After all, these donations could just be those stimulus checks that came in the mail.

Alternatively, maybe Fr. Pfleger was a part of that DaVinci Code conspiracy that Dan Brown and Tom Hanks uncovered, wherein Catholics secretly rule the world…something which, if it were true, I submit, Notre Dame would have had a much better winning record this past decade.

Now I concede that primary season is the time of the improbable that is the world of politics. Everyone gets their lumps. It’s like mental boot camp for the candidates. As an interested spectator, I propose a few strategies for the three wantabes that are seeking the ultimate office in America.

Candidates, please note, none of these strategies were advocated by Karl Rove, nor were they vetted via any public polling.

If Obama really wants to take the DNC without qualms, he should send a few Obama girls over to visit Hillary’s campaign. With the right Obama girls, Bill would swift boat his wife within seconds. Then, you should adopt a symbolic role, declare your administration shall not drive SUV’s and the White House will become Green and have the thermostat stuck at 70 the whole year around as a matter of policy. Declare you will get rid of Air Force One and drive in a hot air balloon or a Zeppelin. Have your motorcade on segways or use the Metro. Bring sweaters back into style. Promise that everyone that votes for you will find their true love, regrow their hair, have healthy gums and season tickets to the local professional soccer team. Promise We will be loved by the Europeans and hand out free Kool-ade.

If Hillary really wants to take the crown, she’s got to show she’s not just an older version of Obama policy. She should go to Iraq unannounced, and then come back and say okay McCain, “Let’s dance.” Then she should demand her place and propose as an alternative, a third party if she doesn’t get it. If she creates a third party, she should meet with McCain, and create the hand shake deal for becoming McCain's Perot to Obama. McCain will get the No. 1 spot and She’ll get a nod to the Supreme Court. The DNC will cave or she’ll win, either way.

Meanwhile, if McCain wants to be the leader of the free world, he needs to decide whose votes he wants and which party he’s the nominee for, RNC or DNC. If he’s going to be leader, he needs to say what he plans to do, what he believes and not back down. If he wants to be president, he needs to convey a vision of what he will do –what policies he will propose and what he will veto. Acting as a leader by gaining consensus through compromise –that’s what happens after one becomes the leader, not how one becomes the head of the pack. If he stops pandering, the RNC will cave.

Finally, McCain needs to inject in his campaign some humor and life about his level of experience and expertise rather than acknowledge any virtue/experience of his opponents.

Old? Seasoned.

Establishment? Really? When I’ve been labeled a Maverick most of my political life?

Out of touch?

I’m not running to be popular. These are the policies I’m for, these, I’m against. I’m running for president. I’m here to govern, not to make you feel cool or cure all ills. The person who says they can do that is lying, not just to you, but to themselves.

As they are, if the US were headed by a committee, these three yahoos would be on it. This is why governors usually do better than senators in national politics. They lead a state, the buck has stopped with them, as opposed to being one of a body of 100. Right now, we have three candidates who want to be the candidate badly, and in some cases, show their desire badly, and no one that shows they want to be more or know how to be more than a candidate.

Here’s hoping one of them grows up by actual Christmas.

Crank Party Platform, Filet O'Fish, Politics and Hillary Too

It’s Thursday, so I do my weekly Political rant type thing.

I scrapped my Richard Blane for President piece, W.W. R.F. C. D. (What would Rick from Casablanca Do?) because it just wasn't working. Too forced. So here's my stab today at political analysis and satire, all rolled up into one, sort of like sushi...you eat it, you sort of like it, you know you sound cool if you can say you had it --or in the case of politics, you talked about it, but truth be told, you'ld rather hit the drive thru at McDonalds for a Fish Filet during Lent...at least then you get fries and a diet coke.(I know you're out there, you closet Filet o'Fish eaters you, that's why they're still on the menu!)

Like the New England Patriots before her, Hillary is in danger of having a perfect season end with losing the Super bowl. And Why?

Because people love new more than old, they want pretty over nuance, and mostly, Hillary has been running on two ideas that do not mesh.

1) I have 35 years experience in policy and politics because I was there during the campaigns and years in the governorship and presidency. By that same logic, I should hang out a shingle, Sherry Antonetti, Attorney at Law. 41 years observing Lawyers make me imminently qualified to handle any legal matters you might have. Of course, there’s the little matter of not having a Law degree or being licensed by the State bar but those are details. I’m really a very good lawyer. I bill a reasonable $250 an hour, prorated by the quarter.

2) I’m the outsider, non establishment candidate, not bound to the Democratic party or its establishment base, even though I helped hand pick the leader of the DNC, am the most senior experienced candidate in the Democratic race and have those 35 years of experience. That’s right, I’m a rebel and a maverick. Did you see me cry yesterday? Wasn’t it moving?

By the same token, John McCain has made his entire career one of ticking off the Republican establishment by cozying up to Democrats, spoiling legislation backed by Republican leadership, rendering the light majority held before the 2004 elections inept and meaningless. Now, he too has chosen to embrace a platform of equally incongruous ideas.

1) I am Republican mainstream. Yeah, I disagree on immigration, tax reform, stem cell research and the role of government in the war on terror, but really, I represent the GOP at its core. Ignore any of those conservative Radio talk show hosts that say otherwise, don’t pay attention to the man behind the curtain…the Great and Terrible Oz has spoken!

2) Those youthful indiscressions of my maverick days in the Senate ---I was just fooling you know? Like Dubya’s drinking and Clinton’s sexcapades, they were just things I did then, I won’t have any flaws when I get to be president. You’ll see. It was just, I needed to assert my own voice. Sure it cost the party seats in the off year election. Sure it enabled Democrats and Republicans to super load any bill with billions in pork, but America will thank me for any policies I help shape…eventually, or they should anyway. Humph! Ingrates.

What strikes me most about both these sterling examples of American Politics at its sausage worst, is they both have the same motivation for running and expecting to win. Indeed, pundits have given their reasons as explanations for why they will vote for Candidate HiLIARY or ABCMcCain, their past sufferings make this position something they are OWED. Hill for standing by her cheating man and covering for him during that second administration, and McCain for his years at the Hanoi Hilton and long string of past runs for the office that have failed. Give the Old War Horse his turn. It’s Time for a Woman’s Turn.

Both are saying, not to give them their chance at this is akin to simply not being fair.

And we Americans like to think that we are fair.

So to be fair, really fair, I want a third party. The Democrats have a donkey, the Republicans, an elephant, my party, the Crank Party will have a flying pig as the mascot. The flying pig will land at the government trough and eat all the dollars. Our platform? To give all Three Trillion dollars back! That’s right. I want a real Rebate, proactively of every last red cent. We’ll close it all down and see if anyone notices.

After all, if we’re not going to enforce our laws, be they about campaign finance or borders, why do we need a government? We don’t need to pay our elected officials because after all, they’re so well off they can easily do two or three speeches about how America stinks and it’s all Bush’s fault and net a cool 3 to 20 million from Europhiles, journalists, university types and political sycophants who will just lap it up. I mean, Hillary’s a junior senator and she just lent her own campaign 5 million. When asked where the money came from, Hillary’s eyes moistened and she gave her best warm smile, “You know, I’m so glad you asked that. Being in touch with my feminine side, I just squirreled away the coins from when I’d vacuum the couch over the years and Bill was always so frugal, he’d empty his pockets every night. The money just sort of added up.” She gushed.

So I submit all government money should simply be returned. All of it. According to the census bureau, there are 303,389,465 Americans, 76,460,574 of which are children. If the 3 TRILLION dollar budget was divided just amongst the adults –ages 18 and up, the checks would come out to be $13,220.00 each. Talk about a stimulus package!

Don’t worry, we’d only proclaim a one year government fast, but have it happen every nine years as a means of ensuring that the country wouldn’t grow too dependent upon the three branches for its daily livelihood.

Now. Imagine if people still worked their jobs. Now, what if we did this on the State and local level as well, it would be a 7-10K swing when all was said and done. 20 Thou back in your pocket. Imagine.

People could open businesses, pay off credit card debts, open new businesses and hire more workers. People would invest and have enough to manage buying prescription drugs and still eat something better than dog food. They could go to the doctors and pay the copay or even buy private insurance. Nirvana would reign for one blissful year and then we’d have to get back to work and figure out what in fact, we really needed or wanted from our government.

We’d need a candidate though…a flying pig Crank candidate…I nominate ….Donald Trump. Can you imagine the ratings on the Apprentice if he was dealing with Senators?
“You’re fired!”
“But I work for free…”

“You’re still fired.”

THE CRANK PARTY IN 2008, THINK IT WILL WIN? SURE, WHEN PIGS FLY!
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