Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Quick Resolutions to Siblings Milking a Joke

Twenty years of parenting, one would presume I've seen almost everything, except these new people keep coming up with ways to surprise me. Like the two year old fighting with her non verbal five year old brother, where he "wins" by humming and holding a small plastic elephant which he points in her direction. Suffering an emotional mortal wound from the blast, she wails and clenches my arms, explaining, "Paul's being mean to me." Sure enough, for a guy with only 25 words, he knows how to milk the ones he has. "Heh heh heh." he says, and once again begins pointing with the traumatizing pachyderm. She screams and sobs. 

How do I break up this fight? It's not like I can appeal to reason, nor can I really discern motivation other than, she feels it, he's feeding off it, we need a distraction. 

Fortunately, the two super allies against the axis of older children normally collaborate their tastes. The younger one knows where the chocolate syrup is, the older one can carry the milk and syrup to me. The result is, both get chocolate milk. This method of persuasion works through erosion of will. With me or one of their siblings making multiple trips back to put the necessary ingredients away until someone either desiring the same snack themselves, or unaware of the chain of "No's," thus forged, gives in and voila, persistence beats resistance every time. 

So I opt to provide them with their favorite snack. "Guys! Look! I'm getting out the milk and syrup and the spoon!" There is a brief lull as the two of them scramble to the table. Alas, I only have one last straw, but a quick scissors snip makes two and I'm thinking, all is right with the world as I serve up cold chocolately liquid goodness. 

Except I neglected to disarm the older brother of his means of torment. Now I have to wonder, do I talk about the elephant in the room or hope a few sips of the drink of peace brings about its desired effect. He pounds the plastic beastie on the table, (more in a Thor like gesture of celebration than aggression), but peace and the drinks spill out of my grasp and onto the floor as the caterwauling of my daughter returns. "He spilled my drink! He hurt my straw." and my son, upon seeing her dismay and putting two and two together, comes to the joke late but with decisive "Heh heh heh." 

Cleaning it up, I declare a universal disarmament, salvage what I can of the snack, explain I've repaired and recovered the straws and there is rapture at the return of joy at the table. Five minutes later, all the fight forgotten, she comes to him, takes his wrist and says, "Let's go play." and they turn horses and hotwheels into a train. We have trains, but just as an elephant is a phaser or taser or teaser in my opinion, so these creatures with horsepower can become an iron horse. Such is the power of the two of them in tandem. Until I here him wailing. It was a bait and switch as she's running with the horses, and I hear as she runs, "Heh heh heh Paul." 

All's fair weather in sibling love and war, but before I break this one up, I'm fixing own myself a glass of chocolate milk.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Brother sister love....gotta love it. Love how chocolate milk can fix many, many problems. Hope you enjoyed yours too.

Freedom :)

Leaving a comment is a form of free tipping. But this lets me purchase diet coke and chocolate.

If you sneak my work, No Chocolate for You!