Sunday, December 25, 2016

Speak Your Heart's Desire

We'd wrapped until 12, 2 and 4 respectively.  The little ones got up at 5:45 am.

So we woke or tried to, and watched as our children reminded us of why all this happens.  My youngest said when she looked at the tree and the gifts and the lights, "I am filled with the Christmas Spirit." She meant it with fullness known only to the innocent and the graced.  Her heart sang just to know, Santa came.  We were given gifts, all of us.  I think her heart fluttered to know, everyone was remembered.

We came to mass as we always do to everything, with a rush and a push and a hunt for socks, shoes, coats and the right pair of pants for someone.  We took two cars despite having a shift go to Midnight.  Two wore jeans.  Two wore beautiful dresses.  Three wore ties.  One son looked around and said, "We don't look polished enough for Christmas mass."  I whispered back, "Those who came first were the worst dressed, those who looked the best came 12 days late."  He laughed.

Somewhere in the mass, I prayed my whole heart.  More than anything, I wanted to hear my son sing, and all my children sing.   Some of my children have beautiful voices, but for whatever reason, don't sing.  I miss their voices when we're together and they're silent. That's the thing with hearts' prayers.  God hears them. God loves them.  And sometimes, when you ask for a miracle, something you could never find in a store or online or through any other means, God rearranges the world so that the answer is yes.

My son told the priest as he shook hands, "Merry Christmas."  Rita, John and I heard it as did the priest.  It always shocks how immediately, God wants to interrupt my day and remind me, God is, and wants to be so present in my life if only I'd let Him.

That afternoon, the family orchestrated a carol for the grandparents, but before that, there was an impromptu version of Hamilton in the kitchen, and everyone was singing.  Again, the lesson echoed. "Speak your heart's desire."  For His is to be ever closer to us.  

Merry Christmas.  Speak your heart's desire and be mindful, for God has given Himself as a gift,  Now, if only we will come and receive Him.  

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