Guaranteed “No’s”

I say yes to a lot of things. Some people, including my husband, would say I say yes too often to too many. Running the fall Festival even though the carnival is the due date of the baby? (2008) Yes. Swimming and Driving lessons that happen congruently. (2010)Yes. Catholic school for the top six? Yes. But big and small, there are some questions that will ensure a negative answer every time. The following is by no means an exhaustive list from only the last 24 hours:

20) Can I have my own computer?

19) Can I have your computer?

18) I want ice cream for breakfast.

17) Can I go to the midnight showing of Toy Story III? Me too! Me Too! Me Too! What about me? (No. No. No. NO. No).

16) After a day of swimming complete with dinner at the pool (chicken fingers, fries, funnel cake and lemonade), upon returning home, “Can I have dessert?”

15) My friend got her ears pierced when she was two. I’m eight…

14) Can I buy a skateboard and a ramp?

13) Do you think we could get a dog?

12) Can I have a tv in my room?

11) Why don’t I have a cell phone?

10) Could I have a stereo?

9) Can we buy a used car?

8) I really really really want another smore. (had 2 and 1/2).

7) Can I ride on the bumper of the van when you drive up?

6) Could I put my sister in the recycling bin and pull her up like a ride?

5) Could I get private lessons to become an Olympic ice dancer?

4) Can I wear this dress? (Christmas velvet long sleeved and outgrown way too short). I really love it.

3) Could I have my own room?

2) Can I use your bathroom?

1) And the number 1 question guaranteed to get a “No” regardless of when, where or how it is asked: Hey Mom! When I graduate, can me and five of my friends drive across country to the Comic book conference in San Diego, CA?