Plotting Penelope

In between shuttling cross country runners and field hockey practice, getting children to sit and do their summer work they've ignored for two months, and maintaining (sort of) the house, I've abandoned Penelope to wait until her writer Odysseus returns (when school starts).

But it doesn't mean I've been idle.  Writing a book means more than character development, it requires plotting out the rollercoaster the reader will enjoy.  It must have dips and turns, twists and unexpected plunges.  It cannot be a straight line or it will bore the reader.

The sheet of paper looks like this:

The first bad day.  (Why Penelope opted to go with Odysseus after her father lost the race).

The worst day. (When Agamemnon and company came to visit).

Being in charge.  Defense, food, maintaining infrastructure, being mom, being alone among the ruling class, alone among the single mothers, an alien in charge of everything, and isolated from everyone.

Being held accountable.   When big plans fail.   When little things are lost.  When there is nothing about tomorrow, save the dull hope, they might come home.

Everyone falls.    Rumors abound of Odysseus being not only alive but enjoying himself on some island somewhere with a woman rumored to be a goddess.   His mom commits suicide.  Her son is a peevish adolescent.  It's ME time.

Everyone fails.   Odysseus returns, and the deaths of 104 suitors and the twelve servant women who served them, and the resentment and fear of the remaining citizens, makes Penelope someone now everyone fears, and Odysseus someone, no one trusts.

The long decay.  Twenty years of rotting, trying to pretend that day didn't happen and neither did the twenty years apart, and of everything around them revealing, all of it did.

A reminder of everything.   People from the past come, telling the story that's become part of everyone else's lives, a dream version with fantastic outcomes.  

Everything burns.   Fight where Penelope and Odysseus finally speak face to face about everything and the cost of all of it.

Rebirth.  

7 Quick Takes

1.   We got to Friday and somehow, I'm surprised.   I also didn't link up to Small Success Thursday --because yesterday was so very busy.   So here's the link to go count your blessings over at Catholicmom.com! 

Sorry it's a day after the fact. 

 

2.  Helen news!   I got a review over at Catholic Fiction.com!  I submitted her back in September.  You can go read it here.  

3.  Next week is the Gaithersburg Book Festival.  I wish I were presenting, but I'll be volunteering for my kids' school at a booth, which will probably (but not assuredly) prevent me from spending too much money on books!

4.  This weekend, my daughter is receiving her first communion.  I've been through now six of these with my children, and they are always special, but this one, she already has such a love of Jesus, it is breath taking and heart squeezing.   So offer a prayer for her as she prepares. 

5.  My son is confirmed next week.  Confirmation is my very favorite sacrament.  Keep him in your prayers as well. 

6.  Next week, we also gear into high exams for my two teens, followed by graduation the following week for one, and exams for my younger adolescents.  We will exhale in June.  

7.  Penelope is doing well, I've been writing on her every day this week, or reading about her, or researching.  I'm taking an online course on Scrivener and it's really helping me to understand this writer's software, it's also making me look at my WIP --work in progress, more often, so it has the double effect of generating more words.  

Here's a sniff: 

“Are you going to chose one of them my queen?” Erika noted the pearl pendant and emerald and gold earrings on her night stand.

“Eurydamas and Peisander at least make a pretense of courting me and not the throne.” Penelope answered. Her face reddened. Erika, seeing her mistress’s embarrassment left the room.

Looking at the jewelry, Penelope sighed. For three years, she’d kept all 108 men dancing, and not one of her servants understood her reasons. She reminded herself they had to be equally unsure of her intent, in order to maintain the facade. Was she perpetually faithful, or perpetually fickle? The men had to believe both, in order to pursue her, and think they had the slightest chance. Her life, like the jewels in the earrings, held many facets, not all of which could be seen at once, only the ones she let catch light.

She put on the pendant for a moment to consider it, and then took it off, wearing such a thing would be too much of a signal of favoritism. She placed both gifts back in her box of trinkets, polished her favorite blue stone silver ring, and placing it on her ring finger, steadied herself for another day of holding all of the court, all of Ithaca, all the world she knew, together, all while hoping somehow, the next day, things would be better.

She walked into the dining room, Men were asleep in their chairs, some drunk on the floor, others missing from the room were probably stealing a few hours with servants willing to serve more than wine and bread. She took the moment to work tiny mischief, and threw open the curtains from the walls, revealing the cutaways her husband created to allow for more light. She rang a bell to signal to the morning staff to assemble and begin clean up, part of which included sweeping out those left over from the evenings repast.

She saw these men for who they were. She scrolled through each of their faces. Agelaus, weak in mind and heart but not body, Amphimedon, ambitious with no prospects and no loyalty either, Amphinomus, decent but dull, Antinous, malicious in every way, rather like keeping a poisonous serpent as a pet. You couldn’t release it, it might return out of habit, and it might bite you just the same if you didn’t. Ctesippus, crude and cruel. Demoptolemus covetous and envious, Elatus, too young and stupid, clinging to where all the men were, not realizing so few of them acted as actual men, Euryades, lazy but desiring a life of luxury. Euryachus, like oil, she didn’t trust him. Eurynomus, the ignoble brother of Antiphus, he lacked his brother’s courage to go serve Ithaca in the fight. She went through them all, she knew them all, it was a tedious business all of these men, none of them moved her mind, body and heart, none of them touched all. Odysseus had. Odysseus still did.

But it had been a long 20 years.

Book of Penelope Update and The Book of Helen

Wrote this for my Facebook page, but since more people read the blog, I'm posting it here.

What have I been up to? Well, writing took a back seat in the month of March and April. I am listening to the Iliad on CD and it's very well done. Additionally, hearing it, you get something of the experience of the early Greeks and how the poem was intended, and thus those vivid descriptions stay with you in a way they don't when you're... going through the marathon equivalent of words. You hear more of the side stories, they pop.

I'm also slowly reading the Odyssey. My tendency in reading, as in writing, is to race through words. Being deliberate feels very Penelope to me, hers is a pensive reflective intellect as opposed to Odysseus's crafty and often impulsive mind. They are complimentary but not entirely opposite, as both she and he enjoy riddles, games of the mind, and strategies. He just loves the accolades of revealing his brilliance to the world --hubris, whereas she finds satisfaction in trying to get the right answer.

The Problem with Penelope...

Penelope's hubris is more subtle, a conviction she can find the right answer in all situations, and that hers is the right answer. She errs toward being self satisfied by her efforts, knowing she's exhausted the options. That doesn't seem bad, and it isn't necessarily, but relying solely on one's own mind, can mean one doesn't see the options others might think of, and having full faith and credit in one's own decisions, does not mean other choices are not valid if they disagree. She's like a writer, who has to learn to hear edits and suggestions if she would make her work better than it is. (Not me you understand, but every other writer in the world--sorry, channeling Helen there for a moment).

Additionally, drawing Penelope out in words remains a challenge, as she is an introvert. She reluctantly takes the center stage, but knows what is expected of her and will perform to her utmost, whereas Helen was and remains the ultimate extroverted celebrity who wouldn't understand why anyone wouldn't want the stage in the first place, but gets that if anyone should get the stage, it should be her. Even when I'm writing about Penelope, Helen is there poking my shoulder, "Hey, what about me?" I need a character exorcism, but in the meantime, she's useful in that I just think, what would Helen do, then how would Penelope do that in contrast, it helps sharpen the story.

Last bit of writing business...

The Book of Helen is up for a critical review at Catholicfiction.net on May 9th, and being reviewed by Eat Sleep Write some time in the next few weeks. I need to start looking for conventions where I can plug Helen and introduce her to others. I need to create some physical drawings from the book for display, for physical events. I'm sifting through the book to determine what scenes would convey best.

Here, we run into a little problem, as one reviewer noted, we don't know specifically what Helen looks like. That decision was deliberate on my part, as she is an archetype, and whatever we paint, will fall short, so rendering her becomes more difficult as that would stamp her for all the world. But I did have a vision of how she looked, so I'm going with that image when I draw. I'll post when Helen is satisfied with my work. I've also been told by others who do book promotions to create a short film/trailer, (except I don't know how to do that). Maybe I'll ask my teens over the summer to take this on for me.

7 Quick Takes

1.  Happy Saint Nicholas Day!

So...you better watch out...I suddenly find new amusement in that song.

2. Planning to make my great grandmother's cookies but with a Christmas twist, dipping them in melted white chocolate for frosting and dusting with peppermint chips.  They're chocolate cookies so this will be a lovely combination.

This image looks pretty much like what they look like when they haven't been frosted. 

Here's the recipe.  Why? Because these sorts of cookies aren't made anymore, they're becoming lost as we get used to slice and bake and forget there were all these sort of old fashioned tastes that had seasonal qualities and harkened to how baking itself, is both a joy and a gift.  The goal isn't just the sweet but the giving/sharing of the sweet.

1/4 cup solid shortening (Crisco)
1 cup brown sugar
1 large egg
1/2 cup milk
1 1/2 cup sifted all purpose flour
1/2 tsp. baking soda
2 squares Baker's unsweetened chocolate
1/2 cup chopped nuts (pecans work great)
1 tsp pure vanilla extract

Combine the first four ingredients. Add the dry ingredients together separately.  Combine all the ingredients and stir until the mixture is well blended.  Drop the cookies with a teaspoon onto an ungreased cookie sheet.  Bake at 350 for 8-10 minutes.  After the cookies cool, frost with a light chocolate frosting.  It can be one cup of confectioner's sugar, 1 tablespoon of milk, and 1 melted square of Baker's semi-sweet, mixed and then used to dip.

Or you can use ready made if you're like me and somehow those glazes never turn out quite right.    

3.  Doing a little Christmas each day is working (so far, but then it's only been 5 days).   We set up the Nativity set one day, another day, we wrote a few Christmas cards.  The day before that, we put up some lights indoors, and the day before that, lights outdoors. (Just a few).  We're just adding a bit by bit each day.  Theme of Advent: Blessed Waiting, Deliberate Willful Beauty.

4.  How are book sales doing?

Well, believe it or not, people don't know I' wrote a book, or that it is published. I got asked today.
Having spent six years writing The Book of Helen, I  know it has moments which will stay with you, and that the story itself has some real beauty to offer.

Here's a link.   If you have bought The Book of Helen and enjoyed it, please consider leaving a review over at Amazon, it helps with ranking, it helps with promotion.

5.  How is The Book of Penelope Coming?

Still reading, still writing, still taking the 30 day novel writing workshop.  I'm starting to see patterns and threads of thought so to speak.  I also miss my laptop.  It has been in the shop since November 13th.  It is very frustrating. But, I have the story, I have an outline (shocker).  I have the ending.  I have the template for what I want to have happen, and I have 15K on it without having the actual work I did before, so I'm very pleased.

6.  I want more variety in my Christmas songs.  Honestly, if you're going to tout yourself as the Christmas station, have enough guts to play something other than The Little Drummer Boy,White Christmas, and I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.   So in a fit of wanting more, I provide you with the following, it's old, but it doesn't matter. It's still good.  

7.  What am I doing this year spiritually?  Well, I'm trying to get beyond the surface of my prayer life, to navigate the interior life that I spend so much time avoiding by keeping very busy.  In an attempt to jump start myself into this deeper form of prayer, I'm hoping to schedule a weekly visit to adoration, to demand I quiet my mind and heart before the Lord, something I'm notoriously bad at doing.   In the meantime, I also found this site, worthy of note for those like me who can't get to adoration as often as they should.   It's a substitute, but a substantive substitute.  Here is the link to view live adoration of the Blessed Sacrament.

Starting Over

Today, I murdered 36,277 words.  Oh, I'll bring them back, some of them, but Penelope was just hitting wall after wall and I realized, I was writing around Penelope, but like in the Odyssey, she was a focal point without being a full actor. After reading a writer's forum column on book writing, I realized Penelope must be established, she needs to be known and if I can't describe her, how she looks, what she thinks, give a snippet of who she is, then I can't very well tell her thoughts.

So I went back to original sources.  What do we know about Odysseus's wife?

1) She's the cousin of Helen, described as quieter.
2) Her father Icarius is so devoted to having her around, he challenges all would be suitors to a race. He beats them and in some versions simply sends them packing, and in other myths, kills them off.  When Odysseus wins the race, Icarius tries to persuade Odysseus to stay in Sparta.  Odysseus tells Penelope to chose between her father and him. She raises her veil to her father, indicating her choice.
3) She is conveyed in the Odyssey as being both patient and cunning, with her unraveling of the shroud, and willingness to wait 20 years.
4) She is also portrayed as being unable or unwilling to make a decision, allowing 104 suitors to linger about, eating everything in sight.
5) She's Spartan educated nobility who holds together a people not her own for 20 years.

What else?   From my own book, (and these were figments of my imagination), I have a little more.  She's been in the Helen book in three little slices of the story, indicating a touch of bitterness or sarcasm when she sends a golden spindle to Helen (Helen gets the dig but appreciates the gift).  Her tapestry  work is known to the ancient world.  (An original Penelope with her signature knot, the Odysseus knot).  And the story of the four girls as the four seasons, where she in a hunting challenge with Polyoxo, Helen and Clytemnestra weaves a fishing net out of the reeds to bring back her catch.   She doesn't win.

Pictures of her indicate tall Greek beauty with dark hair and dark eyes. She is also described as having dark eyes and being a woman who ages well.  She is desired by 104 suitors, and one would presume, for more than simply the title and the riches of Ithaca.  At least a few of those courting her attempt to do so honorably, offering earrings, a necklace, and proposing to be a father to her son.

It's not fun, but because Penelope wasn't going anywhere and I felt the need to try and beat the book forward.  But when I realized, I didn't know what she looked like or why Odysseus chose her, I knew I had a problem. I have a lot of texture to weave into her, to tell her story of how Odysseus chose her and why, what she brought that he could see before they were married, and to tell of the challenges she faced as an outsider/newcomer to a world that she then had to manage and manage well. And then there's the aftermath of his homecoming, where he kills all of the men in a society that has for 20 years been fatherless, brotherless, husbandless and childless, and he's been unfaithful, and somehow, it is supposed to get better.

But it stinks, to kill 36, 277 words.  However, I'd rather write a book people want to read, than one that when people finish, they still don't know who she is.  In a sense, starting over is very Penelope.  As when one weaves a tapestry, if you make an error, you have to pull that thread out and fix it before you can continue or it will simply grow more messy.  So I'm now, unraveling the tapestry, to start over.

Worth the Wait

Most followers know that my book was originally slated to debut in May of this year.  I will tell you, I cried when the day came and went and we were still deep in the editing process.  No book.  It was okay I told myself.  I wanted the Book of Helen to be as good as possible, so this was necessary.

Waiting for something good is always an opportunity for grace.   Because we had to wait, my mother will be here the day the book is available to the public.  I get to share the experience of this book with my mom. It is a gift my heart would have asked for, but never dreamed would come true.

These sort of unexpected moments, like tomatoes you didn't plant that bring forth fruit just the same, these are the stuff of heaven, a letter in the mail, a compliment, found quarters, falling into a book you didn't expect to like, the ice cream truck driving down your street, running into a friend at the pool, and children deciding to pick up their instrument and play their hearts out, these are glimpses of heaven.

What do I mean?

Heaven is not harps and clouds and static.

Heaven is an endless reunion, where you are delighted and delightful.  Heaven is coming home to a clean house, to a cooked meal, finding the garden in bloom, seeing a meteor shower because you happen to be outside.  It isn't constant stimulation, it is constant joy.  We can't grasp it because our joy comes in moments and try as we might, and there are some committed to trying, we cannot hold such feeling, it ebbs away like an exhale or the tide pulling back.  It will come again, but not because we will it. We may orchestrate moments to try and conscript and create the sentiment, but it is a seizing when we feel joy. It does not come on command, nor does it stay confined. It is a quiet flood of happiness that often leaves us speechless. "Oh!"   I said it when I saw the ocean for the first time.  It has been uttered when children were born, when snow fell overnight, and when I tried tres leches cake for the first time.   The first response to joy is to reach to tell someone, anyone, to share the moment, joy shared is multiplied, like the loaves and the fishes.

So I'm happy.  My mom is coming to town and we'll get to share this moment.  It would have been special before this, but this makes it more special.  More joy.  My daughter asked, "What are we doing to celebrate?" and I truthfully don't know, because the celebration has in a sense already started for me.  But I get it, she wants to share in the moment and a party seems the most appropriate way to make it happen.

I'd tell you we're eating Greek food and the like, but I think we'll feast with steak fajitas and sangria, and maybe some obnoxious chocolate dessert!  Then I'm posting a note to myself with the Book of Penelope...it is the motto for the purpose of the Book of Penelope.  Worth the wait.

Thanks for sharing in this moment.  August 9th is just three days away!

7 Quick Takes

 

1.  Helen is due out in 26 days. Good news. My mom and brother both enjoyed it.  Bad news. I'm still editing.  Good news.  It's not as clunky as it was.  Bad news. It still needs buffing and polishing in places.  Good news.  It holds.  Bad news. There is so much more I want to put into this book, because I really have enjoyed having her wander around in my head these past six years.  I'll miss her occasional running dialogue on life.

New caption...what do you mean you're no longer taking my calls?

 



2.  The smell of summer, it is there in the morning. I can feel it. Hints of the hot sticky days to come in the width of a sunbeam and the stillness of the trees. Even better, we booked a vacation!!! We never are this organized. We never think, hey, summer is coming, we should plan something. This year we did!  Can't wait! 

YES!!!!!

 

 

3.  That reminds me....I need to sign up for swimming lessons for at least 5 of them.   I did sign up one for summer school for an extra math class, so that's something...



 

4.  My children sometimes weary I suspect of being on auto-witness.  As part of a large family, it is inevitable that any conversation between adults results in somewhere, somehow, the talk turning to 1) what do you do and 2) do you have any children?  The other day, my second daughter explained what drives her nuts.  It doesn't matter where we are. If someone asks me, "How many children do you have?" she knows the next 20 minutes are shot because there are always follow up questions when the answer is ten.  I pointed out there were always follow up question when the answer was five but she countered that she's heard the answers all her life, and that people romanticize big families because I speak about it happily.  It doesn't help that their mother loves to talk.  

 

5.  But what she doesn't realize, is that even at two children, this was part of the reality of our lives. I had just delivered my second child. She was being cleaned at the nurse's station. I was calming down and looking at her.  "She's beautiful." I said.  The nurse held her up for me to see.  "Are you going to have any more?" she asked as she handed me my first daughter.  I looked at her eyes, at her face, I breathed in the perfume of a newborn and said, "Oh yes."

 

6.  The Book of Penelope...yes...I'm writing my second book. Yes, it is a continuation of what happened in The Book of Helen, but also...not. 

 

It is the same time. It is the same world. It is a very different woman, a woman whose power and authority rest internally, rather than manifest itself as luminous.  Helen was beauty. Penelope is not Helen.  Helen's life, her sins and virtues were  largely public knowledge. Penelope's struggle was quiet, long, domestic, intimate and only celebrated in relation to her husband.  Her faithfulness in his absence, her crafty handling of multiple predator men in a world ruled by men, these are what has made her famous.  But what made Odysseus choose her. How did he court her?  Where did she find the internal fortitude to hold on for twenty years? How did they come back together after such a long separation and what scars were created by wounds from the long years of absence? These are the questions. 

 

My initial thinking is that Penelope is first and foremost, a creature of duty.  But duty, done even faithfully without love, done without relationship, becomes a form of bitter martyrdom of all the sweetness of life.  So it is that Odysseus must re-win his wife's true affection and willingness to share what she has spent twenty years mastering to withhold, her own thoughts and feelings on everything.  He will also have to come face to face with the problems of having been a ghost of a memory as a father for so long, and competing with his own history/legend when the real person must face the consequences a legendary story version of the same man, never did. 

 

His wife and son know the tales. Neither is willing to gloss over the injuries done to them by Odysseus's dalliances with Calypso and Circe and others.  Combined, they should make for a serious powder keg of feeling.   Whereas with Helen, I collected luminous moments like fireflies, I will be trying to weave al the threads of these three broken lives into one coherent tapestry.  

 

7.  Is this thing on?  I keep seeing that the people who read my posts go up and up and up, while the only comments I get are from Spambots.

 

I wаs νeгy pleaѕed to
dіscοver this grеat site. I ωanted to thank you
foг ones time for this particulaгly ωоndeгful read!
! I definitely liked every bit of it аnd i аlso have уou saveԁ as a faνorite to ѕeе
new stuff on yоur ωеbsite.

 

 

So if you're human, if any of this made you laugh or think or remember, I've got to start planning a vacation, leave a comment. I'm starting to think this blog is me and the spambot crickets.  

 

For whoever does leave a comment who is not a spambot...here. 

 

 

P.S. Don't feed the spambots. It makes them multiply...like tribbles.





Helen Update

The first round of edits went to the editor last week.  Now, I am tackling the second round.  She has sent me the first 80 pages. I have run through the first 43.  I hit a wall.  Writing about hitting a wall helps me acknowledge I've become stuck and thus start becoming unstuck.  I'd been living in the world of I'm a writer, I just finished editing so I can rest on my laurels.  Or as my daughter illustrated: 

One of the first things you learn to NOT do, is head hop.  This is not taught or even talked about outside of writer circles. I'd never heard of it until I read about common mistakes writers make in the course of exploring the forums of Absolute Write. Head hopping is where you get insights into what different people are thinking in a scene that affect the scene without being voiced or observed by anyone in particular.  If you have an all knowing narrator, this is still a problem as it can be confusing who is doing the talking.   I have a few moments I need to rewrite to eliminate hopping from head to head.

Absent having characters with telepathy, which if I wrote sci-fi would be a prerequisite of writing such stuff, as conversations within conversations would be fun, you can't do it. Even if you think your book is ground breaking, you can't do it.  This give me small satisfaction, to know if Faulkner wrote the Sound and the Fury today, he wouldn't be able to confuse the daylights out of me because his editor would have flagged him for major head hopping.   Yes, I'm still smarting from my American Authors class in junior year of college and I should let that go.  

So I'm going to hit the next 20 pages today. 

With the first book in the second editing stage, I am now starting to collect the books needed for the sequel, the Book of Penelope.  Why? I need background, a blueprint and scaffolding. I don't want to make the same mistake twice. 

What mistake? 

I cannot stress this enough, I would have finished Helen at least a child and a laptop ago if I hadn't tried to write this thing without the benefit of an outline or at least a map of the story.  I knew where I wanted to go, but not how to get there.  Dead reckoning for the novice writer seldom gets you to the destination.  You can be bull headed (my favorite technique), and you might eventually get to the magical words, "The End," but only after a lot of detours.  In my case, at least 50,000 words of deleted chapters before the ones that got deleted in the editing process. 

Why bring this up?  Yesterday, I saw a comment on a writing post, "I'm a great writer and I've written a lot of little things but I want to write a book.  I don't want to do an outline, I just want the book to happen." 

I can say right now, that book won't happen. 

Books don't happen.  They may be inspired, they may write quickly, they may be clear, they may be best sellers.  They don't just happen.  Waiting for inspiration in order to write is like waiting until you are hungry to start cooking. You can bang out some mac and cheese or maybe a steak if it's defrosted, but to make a good meal, requires planning, technique, the right ingredients and time.  So also, a good book.  I don't have a genii producing a gourmet meal, and there is no book genii writing the book either.  The book genii says "Hey genius, you want to write the book?  Start outlining."  (See, your english teacher in high school was right about this). 

I'll have my same 7th-10th grade response too.  It's hard to outline a piece you haven't written.  I don't yet know all that the Book of Penelope is supposed to be about.  However,  I've learned the inspiration will come if I just get moving and it's a lot easier to craft the scenes you want than to kill scenes you've poured time into and fallen in love with, but which don't advance the story. 

So I do understand the desire to wait for lightning to strike before starting, but I've told myself, you know how this works, so get to it.

If you need me today, I'll be editing or outlining, presuming inspiration will come and maybe saying "Thanks" in my head to my high school english teachers.