Hold onto the Nails, not the hurt.

Facebook brings us many people talking about and linking to many things, not all of them just, kind or beautiful. One had an angry screed at the top because the person felt outrage at the callus laughter of those who beat a man as the description of his beating and injuries were discussed in court. He called them not human.
 
Another posted smugly about her politics, and how uneducated the other side stubbornly remains for daring to think otherwise.
 
I received an email demanding I stand up against my own Church because it does not sanction what the world has decided must be.
 
In every case, and I saw people rallying to the other side, people assembling on the internet in camps of left and right, Republican and Democrat, White and Black, Christian and non Christian, those in favor and those who oppose the redefinition of marriage as recognized by the state, and in every place, I saw people declare the other side, Not Human. Or less worthy human. Or even worthless. All matter of civility and principles, manners and charity were exchanged for vitriol, I'm right, you're a dunderhead. But in less gentle terms. Everyone everywhere felt entitled, justified to hold onto the hurt. 
 
And all I could think over and over again is Human. All too Human. Human. Human. Human.

As are all of you. And yet, we keep discarding that belief in others and presuming to keep it for ourselves. Even if what they did was wrong, callus and horrific, they remain human, like all of us, human, broken, sinful, wrong, capable of great wrong, and still, fully human. One does not lose humanity by daring to think differently, or by opposing what is popular, or by being flawed, or being old, or being young, or being unborn or by having failed mightily, or by having engaged even in great evil.  Even the abortionist, even the pedophile, even the terrorist, remains human. Nothing divorces our souls from being souls. 

Praying and even loving our enemies, foreign and domestic, political and social, is a direct command from Christ, a direct instruction on how to "turn the other cheek."  Hate can only be diffused by love.  Christ willed himself to stay on that cross to the end, until the last drop fell, until He knew he could say, "It is finished." because of love.  He didn't hold onto the hurt, He held onto the nails.  He could have come down from that cross, but He didn't, because He held onto those nails for our sake. 

And then I went to a blog where a mother journals her struggle to care for a child with a condition that fused her fingers into mittens, and her cranial plates, and I can see from her pictures, from her writng, this is a family that has embraced their daughter and seeks to love her as fiercely and as perfectly as possible.

And I know, this is what we are called to be, to be fully human. All made in the image of God, and beloved by God and made to love as God loves, even those we see not doing their part, not seemingly worthy or educated enough or polished enough or beautiful enough, still supposed to be beloved by us. Human. Human. Human.

Hold onto those nails.  Hold onto the words, "Father Forgive them, for they know not, what they do." It is the only way to remind the world, of how it was truly intended to be. 

Soap Box Time

Soap Box #1.  I didn't watch the Grammy awards, and from all reports, I only missed that they decided to drop the veil of pretending to care what we plebeians think.  Today's entertainers continue the relentless quest for how to find the underside of the bottom of the barrel of bad taste.  Miley outdid Brittany who outdid Janet, and now Katy Perry seeks to carve out her niche with all who like watching a cocktail of fire, pole dancing and Satanic references. But I'm more stunned anyone has any energy to express outrage.
 

How is it that the Grammy awards surprised anyone? 

I'll give the girl credit, the bar has been raised...or lowered, depending upon how you want to work that metaphor.

As the whole of the entertainment industry commits itself to triple dog daring each other how to lick and twerk enough to cause stomach upset, we grow less capable of having our sensibilities rocked. So in the interest of self preservation (I don't want to bleach my brain or eyeballs), let's just tell them, the culture is dead, they win. We'll declare ourselves outraged and shocked and

The bell rang. We're going back inside now.

Soap Box#2  After all, our culture is currently at war with anything that smacks of holding onto sanity.  Ideology has become the new American Idolatry.  There is acceptable thinking, and everyone else.  Everyone else, shut up and let the smart people govern and entertain. 

For example: the Governor of New York declared those who hold pro-life views aren't welcome in his state.  Before someone says, "You're taking it out of context...he meant." I've read what he said. I've read what he said we should think about what he said.  I've read the "context."

 Here's my response.  If someone like say, Sarah Palin said, "Those who are pro-choice should form their own state or get out." The calls for her head that haven't yet been made, would still be non stop streaming on the television.  The internet would melt from the scores of posts, tweets and blogs about the intolerant right wing.  No later back pedaling, I only meant extremist when I said that would satisfy.

So no. I'm not buying his latest non apology or the ditto he received from the new mayor of New York. They meant it.  They think it.  They believe it.  Pro-lifers, we shouldn't be part of the public square.  Besides, there aren't that many of you so just go with the flow.

Annual flash mob of Ninjas

We're gumming up the utopia that would be by daring to not agree.  

Which brings me to Soap Box Issue #3

Modern thinkers love to remember Saint Francis as the sort of patron saint of bunnies, and he loved the earth so, there's that.  But all that other stuff?  Forgettaboutit!

Any time Catholics integrate faith into the whole of life, we're just being simplistic. Probably people said that to SAINT FRANCIS too.

 

"Think you're taking this give everything away and follow me a bit too far Francis."

Following the arguments of those who think Catholics ought to just get over themselves and their religion and stop imposing their values on others by not wanting to pay for birth control or abortion, the general gist of it is this:

For those of you who still believe in God, trust us.  We know God understands if we need to make allowances for modern living even if you don't. They then assert there isn't anything in the bible that says "No abortion" or no "birth control."  followed by some attempt to claim there isn't any God but if there was...He/She/It/ would think like they do.

Remember I said judge not.  That's the only thing you have to do.  I didn't mean any of that other stuff.  YOLO!

 

One can almost hear Kathleen Sebelius pondering, "Would someone rid us of these troublesome nuns?"  Saint Thomas Beckett, pray for us.

Being Catholic means turning the other cheek. So I'm feeling a bit cheeky today, mirthful and merciful.  Turning the other cheek isn't rolling over. It's fighting back with grace, humor, joy, wit, knowledge and truth.

Our society is trying to discern do we serve the government or does the government serve us? 

If it is the former, then any who think otherwise must be brought to heel, if it is the later, than there is room for those for whom religion, faith, vocations, aren't to be kept in a box for Sunday or simply used at the soup kitchen. I could argue that people who believe in what Jesus said at the sermon on the Mount about feeding the hungry, serving the poor, caring for the sick, visiting the lonely to the point of living it are the reason for being at mass on Sunday and why you serve at a soup kitchen, they are why there is a soup kitchen.  But I'll point out instead, you won't have a society of civilized kind people if the only reason for not breaking the law is the threat of punishment, you will have martial law even if it is only done via economic lashes of the whip.  

Free people think freely, speak freely, worship freely, act freely.  They hold vigorous debate, they argue, and they stipulate that the other side may disagree without being utterly devoid of sense, sensibilities and legitimate grievances.  Memo to Laura Levites and all those who think wishing evil, violence and death upon political opponents is clever thoughtful commentary.  Stop it.  And if you can't stop yourself, I'll just say (cause I'm Southern), "Bless your heart." and then because I'm Catholic, I'll have to (and it won't easy), pray to mean it in a non ironic or sarcastic way.

Bottom line:

 

The State of the Union is precarious, because a nation divided against itself cannot stand, and as long as the political climate insists upon pitting right against left, religious against anyone else, man versus woman, and DNC vs. GOP and lays everything as a you're for us or against us and if you're against us, you're ignorant or evil or both, we cannot have a thriving nation, or a thriving people.  Being told you're either surrounded by ignorance and evil or that you are ignorant and/or evil, drains the public spirit, the will to go out and really address the serious pressing problems our country faces in real time. Such a lens always forces the viewer to eliminate half of the solution by dismissing any and all disagreement as made in bad faith. We can only work at our best if we are a Union, not a squabbling nation in need of counseling and in danger of divorce. 

 

We need to be able to have discussions about serious topics of dispute that don't translate to sound bites or become used as a sledge hammer against the other side. A reasonable government would not demand people violate their religions to satisfy a political goal. We need to recapture the beauty and genius of our government and our nation, which included limitations on power and procedures which insured culpability for action and inaction in the three branches of government, a firm belief in the fair application of rule of law, not the selected prosecution and enforcement of some or of mitigated justice based on economics, color or creed.  We need to recapture the promise this nation held, that people could make it, because we remained people free to try and free to succeed. 

 

 

Book Report

Summer reading is a luxury I eagerly anticipate every year.   Like overpriced cheap ice cream from a truck, there's just something elegantly indulgent about feasting on a book during the hot sticky months.  My children will tell you, when I read, I hear nothing but the words on the page.  If allowed, I will go for hours until the book is finished, without food, without talking, without really moving.  That world that the author created, becomes the more real world than the real world for the time of the book. I also cannot leave a book abandoned.  If I start it, I have to finish. 

I like to read women's fiction, mostly historical fiction. 

But lately, I've noticed a trend. Maybe it's the books I've picked up and it is just a coincidence, but these are books that sold very well, most are best sellers, so cumulatively, they reveal a pattern even if I have only my experience to back up my thoughts.

It is very quiet but I've begun to wonder if it is ubiquitous.

First, there is always a reluctant benevolent abortionist. It is sort of a variant on the hooker with a heart of gold, an unquestioned conceit that enjoys tacit acceptance by the publishing world, and thus the reading world.  The woman who provides the medicine is usually the narrator. She's been gradually introduced to the skills of midwifery and initiated into the secret world of women.   Being present for birth, deaths, suffering, tears, all of these great and epic moments gives her gravitas in that historical context and our own.  Hers is the school of experience, and we grant it the full measure of a Ph.D. We the reader are swept along with her, trusting her understanding of all these events as being both truthful and truth.   

Thus when girls come to her sobbing and begging to have their children destroyed, the woman who has seen so much and has a greater understanding of the risks involved in pregnancy than we the readers, agrees. (In Neferetiti, she is pained by the irony of giving what she unwillingly received --handing them the poison that was used on her) but we don't spend much time on this, she merely remarks that she's pained by the irony. We're told, not shown.We get sprinkled reasons without delving into them (an affair, an abusive father, too many at home, old, a failed romance). She's remarkably incurious, she simply dispenses the requested herb. This is treated rather as a business transaction, an emotionless thing such that when she must travel, her attendant/servant steps in to take her place and provide the herbs as needed. No big whoop.

I first encountered this archetype reading "Don't Bet on the Prince," a collection of feminist fairy tales with the story, The Green Woman.  At the time, I thought it was a modern writer imposing modern sensibilities on an older time.  Next, I notcied it was in Myst of Avalon, but it was a minor plot detail so I glossed over it. But it kept popping up, like moral kudzu.  In Nefretiti, she is both the victim and the performer of such deeds.

Now I am reading the Red Tent and while I am enjoying it, it is there.  The wives of Jacob collude to help the abused slave of their father.  Everyone agrees that the abused woman they have ignored all this time, should have her pregnancy terminated.  They give her the herbs needed to abort her child.  Everyone agrees this is the right call. But there is no discussion other than how and when, no questioning of why or should.  The doomed Ruti gets a bit of fellowship and sympathy afterwards, but ultimately, she goes back to being ignored and eventually slits her wrists when she will be left behind with her abusive master.

The second cliche is the ubiquitous ancient secret use of all sorts of birth control in the earlier world. Drinking fennel tea to prevent conception, or use these crushed herbs, which Nefretiti, the Green Woman, the wives of Jacob, the women of Mysts of Avalon who have been part of the temple, all know and use.  

This is not a demand for  a rubber stamp on all literature before I read it. I've merely noticed that the stories we read, reflect the myths of the time.  The stories we buy, reveal what those who authorize publication, believe we want to read. Ergo, the books reveal what we want to hear, the myths we want retold.  The myths being sold are stories that say we have always been as we are now, and no one need engage in any questioning of any of this...be soothed and know that all of this is normal and always was normal, it's just those uptight silly people who think we ought to think about these sort of actions and their long term ramifications.  We've always done this.  It's normal. It's not a moral question. 

But we haven't always done this.  

Historical fiction thrives on creating creative ways of linking the modern mind to the ancient world...but they are essentially other than in the researched details of what people ate and wore, for the most part, wikipedia versions of those realities.  For all our imagination, the authors are simply super imposing our own modern sensibilities on a holographic past setting. And these sensibilities emerge in the characters, whether they wear star fleet uniforms or togas or corsets. If the author does drop into the thinking of the time, it will be for the sake of creating a person who is stuck in their time, a villain or stooge or simpleton who cannot move the story along.  The person we follow must endure them, overcome or help them "evolve." It is the stuff of fiction.

In this case, there is a clear series of messages beneath the surface of woman's fiction. The herbalist woman has become the convenient catch all for every plot hole on how to get modern medicine and sensibilities into past times, with the wink and nod that this type of information of the past was lost because of superstitious religious folk simply not understanding...and actively seeking to destroy it.  Abortion is no big deal and legitimate if you want to cover up an affair, have a mean husband/boyfriend or don't want any more children.  Sex is a burden and a pain, even if it brings pleasure. Intimacy of story, intimacy of the mind is reserved for talk between women, not husband and wife. 

The added bonus in historical fiction is that the woman (thanks to being a midwife), know of scores of women that they have witnessed dying in childbirth, ergo they can use fear of death against intimacy with their husbands as a result.  They manage their men.  The gulf between the sexes is wide and deliberate, with protagonist women often surprized if the men they marry or that court them turn out NOT to be monsters.   This is in their minds, the exception of men, not the rule. Men who become acceptable husbands are beautiful, pleasurable, noble and utterly secondary in their rendering. They show up for the babies and the courtship and at the appropriate dramatic moments, but hold no actual weight.  These are not men.  These are female myths of men.  They are as airy as the fem fatales of penny dreadfuls and meaningful as sex dolls.  There is no meeting of souls and minds, only tenderness of touch and agreement on all things; Ken dolls with verility and in occasional cases, fecundity for secondary lead women.

Ultimately, these stories have me noticing the myths being perpetuated that erase the moral element of sex, of abortion, of birth control and reduce all relationships between men and women to those of power and eroticism. The new myths being crafted in our popular culture whisper perpetually, there is no real intimacy, only pleasure, no discussion, only agreement. You "Like" or you do not.  You must be an island to be free, you must be an island to be happy. You also must agree with every other island to be enlightened. Everything else is a throw away or sell out of you, your future and your life.   Appetites of the self, must be appeased. (Twilight, Eat Pray Love, 50 Shades of Grey)  Appetites of another...may be endured if they coincide with my appetites or lead to a greater thing I want (children, a diversion of the male so someone else can escape, or a deception to gain access to greater power or information which is also power).

All of which makes me wonder....if someone wrote a different sort of story, would it be dismissed as a fairy tale?  While it's harder, the beauty and realness of male female relationships and what they demand and entail would be more fun to write...and read. 

All this from summer reading....wait until we start going to summer movies.  So what am I doing today?  Finishing the Red Tent and I think there is a Dove Bar calling me.  Happy Summer!